grace, mercy, kela and al - wedding

Today in our responsorial psalm we hear the enthusiastic call of the psalmist, a call filled with eagerness and excitement, to bless the Lord, “bless the Lord, my soul, let all that is within me bless his holy name."  The call to bless the Lord is not just ordinary praise, to bless God means to fall down on one's knees, in fact it means, to be brought down to one's knees in awe, in sheer joy and gratitude to God.  Why, because of two characteristics of God mentioned in the psalm. And what are these characteristics of God?  God is gracious and compassionate.  In God there is grace and mercy, two words which the psalmist says are the benefits of God, the reason why our souls, our whole being in fact should bless the Lord. God is Gracious and compassionate; in God there is grace and mercy.  

What is grace, what is mercy? Grace is getting what you do not deserve.  You do not deserve to be helped, you do not deserve to be blessed, and yet you are saved and you are blessed.  Now that is grace, for grace is getting what you do not deserve.

What is Mercy?  Mercy on the other hand is not getting what you truly deserve.  You deserve to be punished, you deserved to be cursed, and yet you were not punished, and you are not cursed.  Now that is mercy, for mercy is not getting what you truly deserve.  

These are two characteristics of God often praised in the psalms, particularly in psalm 103, two facets of God's love for all of us – grace and mercy. Grace - getting what you do not deserve.  Mercy - not getting what you truly deserve.  And that is the reason why we come to bless the Lord, we are brought down to our knees in awe because kneeling is always the posture of the underserving and this is our posture when we are confronted by grace and mercy – the very characteristics of God's relationship with us.  This is how God loves us and this is how Jesus told us to love one another, the ideal of our relationship with each other – to love as God loves us, to live my life with the consciousness that everything in it is undeserved – we are loved not because we deserved to be, we merit to be but because of grace and mercy.

Al, you do not deserve Kela. You are not the knight in shining armour ready to rescue a damsel in distress.  She is not the trophy of your conquest or the reward for the good that you think you are and have.  No.  In reality you need Kela.  You need her direction, you need her thoroughness in facing life’s responsibilities, you need her determination in getting things done, you need her ability to see things for what they are, you need her capacity to face problems squarely without having to blink most of the time.

And Kela, you do not deserve Al either.  You are not wonder woman out to save the world nor are you the dream girl that he deserves.  No.  In reality you need Al.  You need his positive and relax aura.  You need his out of the box and not from the book approach to life.  You need his patience.  You need his flexibility to find other means.

Even your flaws are put to good use.  Al, you need her anxiety and her fears as much as she needs your carefree spirit and your lightheartedness in dealing with life.  Kela you need to allow Al to take care of your fragility in the same way that Al believes and even depends in your capacity to get things done.  You need him.  You need her.  It is in the acknowledgement of your imperfections and your needs that you become grace and mercy to each other - underserved and unmerited, nevertheless assured that you are loved.

In any relationship, whenever somebody claims to be the solution to all our problems, whenever somebody claims to be the answer to all our needs, without acknowledging that he is himself is wanting, that she herself is in need, that relationship can become abusive. We have become what we are right now because of this - a country that has become too unforgiving, a world that seeks to exact revenge tit for tat; relationships that cannot tolerate and overlook mistakes and imperfections; unions where the only solution to problems is leaving and quitting.  Little do we realize that what glues us together, what keep us together are grace and mercy – and these are the very qualities of God's love, the very same qualities that bring us to our knees to bless the Lord with our whole being.  We are undeserving and yet we are loved, it is unmerited and yet we receive help.  Grace and mercy are the two facets of God’s love, and this is how Jesus told us to love one another – to love as God loves us.

Al and Kela build your marriage on this rock – on the rock of God’s love.  Remember its two facets – grace and mercy.  Grace is getting what you do not deserve.  Mercy is not getting what you truly deserve.  Only then can the marriage last.