psalm 51: a misplaced heart - ash wednesday

Today we reflect on psalm 51, our responsorial psalm.  This is the psalm we pray every Friday morning.  This psalm is entitled "A Psalm of David, when the prophet Nathan came to him after he had gone in to Bathsheba."  That’s the title.  I believe you know the story – David had an affair with a married woman Bathsheba which produced a child.  To cover up the sin, he persuaded the husband Uriah to sleep with his wife.  But after several failed attempts to convince Uriah to do so David panicked and had him sent to battle where the fighting is fiercest so that he would surely get killed.  With the husband dead, he married Bathsheba.  This is the trademark of sin – it leads one deeper and deeper into the abyss.  Adultery led to lying and cover-up which eventually led to murder. David’s conscience however bothered and haunted him.  And because God loved David so much, God did not want him to be destroyed by this hidden sin.  And so one day the prophet Nathan confronted David of his sin and in great remorse psalm 51, the great psalm of mercy, was composed.

Have mercy on me, O God, in your goodness; in the greatness of your compassion wipe out my offense. Thoroughly wash me from my guilt and of my sin cleanse me.

Two things I would like to point out in this psalm.  First, David asked for a clean heart.  He did not say, Lord, please change my behavior, please help me stop my amorous adventures.  No, David did not ask for a change in attitude or outlook or a better plan for his life.  Instead he asked for a clean heart, “a clean heart create for me, O God.”  It is not that behavior is unimportant, no.  But real conversion must always be a conversion of the heart.  When the heart is in place everything will just follow – behavior, attitudes, outlook, plans.  Only when the heart is in place. 

Kon kaisa naga-ugtas kami, ngaa wala na nagaiskwela, ngaa wala na naga-pass assignment, ngaa naganubo ang grades, ngaa late lang pirme, ngaa indi katulog, ngaa nagatinunto.  Kis-a ang gina-ugtasan ta ang behavior.  Pero siling ni David indi amo sina ka simple.  The heart is not in place.  To change the behavior, to change the outlook, to change the attitudes you have to look into the heart.  Where is his heart?  Why is his heart restless?  What is his heart longing for when he does that?  Sin is not bad behavior.  Sin is a misplace heart, a misplaced love.  Amo ina ka simple sang pormasyon, kag amo man ina ka budlay.

Second.  When David acknowledged before God his sin he did not say “I committed adultery and I covered it up with lies and then I ended it with murder.”  You cannot find that in the psalm.  Rather David said to God, “against you, you alone I have sinned, what is evil in your sight I have done.” 

If you remember, when the prodigal son presented himself to the father he did not say, “father, I was so stupid in demanding my inheritance, I was so stupid in squandering them off in loose living.”  No.  Instead he said “Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you.”  Sin is not a bad behavior, sin is not a psychological disorder, sin is not bad judgement, no.  Sin is against a person, a person who loves us, a person who is after our good, a person who cares for us.  Sin is always personal, it is a failure to love enough that person, because our hearts are misplaced, because our hearts are somewhere else. 

Today is Ash Wednesday, March 1. Last Monday sa amon meeting sa cathedral nag-istorya kami sang love story sang isa ka tawo.  Siling sang isa sa amon, hingagaw, hingagaw nga istoryahan agod makaabot pa sa buwan ng mga puso.  Come to think about it Ash Wednesday is also a hingagaw sa buwan ng mga puso – a chance to look into our hearts kag husisaon kon diin gid man ini sia napahamtang.  Kon ari ka diri kag ang imo heart is elsewhere, no wonder you are always late, no wonder you cannot sleep, no wonder you cannot pass a simple project, no wonder you cannot follow the rules, no wonder you fail because you don't want to study. 

And so we fast, we abstain today to prod our hearts and to peer into its inner workings so that we will know where our heart truly is. And knowing where it is, we can ask God to put it to rest where it should truly be.