a failure ... 2nd week tuesday

Today in our first reading, we see Samuel grieving.  He was grieving because Saul was rejected by God for his disobedience.  Saul was no longer a king recognized by God.  But that is not the only reason why Samuel was grieving.  Samuel grieved because he probably felt like a dismal failure.  He was Saul’s mentor, he was his teacher, his guide; he was like a father to him, a spiritual leader to him.  Now however Saul was rejected by God.  He disobeyed God, he sinned against God and because of that he was no longer king in God’s eyes.  It must have been very frustrating to Samuel and thus he grieved like a father to his now dead son.

As mentors, teachers and parents ourselves, can you relate with the grief of Samuel? Have you also experienced a similar situation when a person you have cared for, the person you formed and taught, when a person whom you have loved and from whom you are expecting many things, ended up a failure?  Have you felt yourself a failure?  Have you blamed yourself for the loss?  Did this discourage you from your task, from your assignment, from your responsibilities?  Did it give you doubts regarding your vocation and mission in life?

Samuel took time to grieve, and it took him probably quite some time so that God had to remind him of the task ahead.  And so despite of how he felt about himself he had to move on and anoint a new king in the person of David.

We fail in so many ways.  But we never give up because of our failures.  We never give up even if the ROI is minimal.  Our work in the seminary is like that too.  You do what you can, you give your all and for all your efforts you will be rewarded with one or two or three priests a year.  Sometimes none at all.  We grieve for a time but every time a young person comes in, hope is once more enlivened.  In the end you have to understand that it is God who calls and it is God who chooses.  We just have to give our all and do the best that we can.