basoy: Basoy Daquilanea's Funeral

And in true Daquilanea fashion, within an hour of leaving the hospital after Tatay's body was sent off to the funeral parlor, we were already laughing (albeit a little sadly), mocking and enjoying each other's company.  And I'm pretty sure Tatay was doing that very same thing with my mother and all other family and friends who have passed on in the afterlife.

This is Roy’s narrative of the event as told in Facebook.  What Roy did not include in this narrative, which he entitled, “The House of Basoy", was the hour after that hour after they brought Tay Basoy to the funeral parlor.  I would like to continue where Roy left off.  This is how “the two hours later” went if it was written on Facebook.

And yet again true to the Daquilanea fashion, after another hour, we were all laughing again (albeit just a little bit sadly) as we came up with reasons to convince Fr. Andy why he should give the homily on Tatay’s Funeral.  First, somebody suggested that tatay left instructions that whoever would be the last priest to pray over him should give the homily during his funeral. Of course it was an obvious lie but we agreed in case Fr. Andy investigates, to just simply say it’s true, and besides ‘he cannot ask tatay anymore, and if tatay can reply I think, even if he will not go with the lie, he will go for the fun and humor of it.  Weng, however, told everyone that when Fr. Andy was about to leave after praying for Tatay, he told her to tell Noodles that if she needed anything, she would just call him.  Probably the poor priest meant only to give her a paschal candle for the funeral mass but since we have a lawyer in the family we can always insist on the wording of the contract.  But nobody bested Marissa’s revelation when she said that she could convince Fr. Andy to do the homily.  Why?  She was cancelling one other homily she lined up for him.  And what is that?  She was cancelling a wedding homily.  And how is that?  She finally decided to everyone’s consternation not to get married. And then we laughed.  “That was just how it was in the House of Basoy, because he always taught us that no matter how hard life got, you could always laugh about it with family.”

And that, is how I ended up in this pulpit today.  With all the laughing we had over the phone as we negotiated this arrangement I got so confused afterward, was I going to give a homily to a funeral or to something else?

Basoy, I was told, was a strange Christian, strange in the sense that he does not fit the mould like most of us.  For one he goes on visita iglesia in the morning, mind you a visita iglesia in the morning, in the morning of Holy Wednesday.  Things like this can become confusing when you look at things with a mould in mind, when we have at hand a long list of criteria that would define who is and who is not.  But then we will miss the Christian in a lot of people. 

I chose the gospel that would, for me, define the faith of Basoy, and I guess of many catholics, some of them are here.  It is a kind of Christianity that does not do away with the surprises that accompany the living out of our faith.  When did we see you hungry and feed you, when did we visit you in prison?  Judgement day for many will be a surprise.

We have created a criteria for almost everything - what is catholic, what is not; what is christian, what is not; who is good and who is bad; in my line of work, who becomes a priest, who does not; who qualifies as msgr. and who does not.  Yes a criteria may be needed, drawing the line may be called for but in doing so let us not become like fundamentalists who believe they knew every aspect of the mind of God or who claim an inkling in the workings of grace.   Let us not take away the surprises that come from the judgement of God.  Let us not take away the surprises wrought about and brought about by the subtlety of grace at work in our lives, or by that innate goodness in each one of us pronounced “very good” during creation by no less than our very own Creator, God.  Let us not take away the element of surprise in what I call the “sense” of faith that permeates even the ordinary, the sense of surprise at how the “sacred” penetrates and interweaves the ordinariness of daily life even in those we consider far from holy, even in those we consider far from being a part of Christ.  Be surprised!  Recover the sense of surprise.

Roy wrote, My father was not a saint, not by a long shot.  I'm not even talking about the fact that all my life, the only time I ever saw him in church was to attend a wedding or attend his own son's induction to the priesthood.  ("Wala man ko ya sala." as Tatay was wont to say.)  

Part of the irony of or the surprises in the life of Basoy - he helped build up politicians but he never won any public office, and he built his children to love the church he himself seldom ventured to enter.  Now explain that.  Explain that.

Many times we find that our criteria do not apply, many times we find that the mould we created does not fit.  God was creating something else.  Many of us will probably say wow, or some of us may end up in disbelief muttering “what?” That’s what happens when we only see norms and criteria.    Perhaps Basoy is a sign that many times our logic does not work, one plus one do not always make two.  Perhaps it is an invitation to go beyond the logic of morals, to go beyond just laws and regulations, to go beyond the mere expected and approved behavior, to go beyond our criteria, and to become mystics, to recover the element of surprise in our faith in God who is the totally other, to see grace at work in ways we could not understand.

And so, how would Basoy be remembered?  I like very much the tribute of the grandchildren.  We know very well that the grandchildren more than the children themselves have a more real perception of grandparents because they, the grandchildren, elicit naturally in them that innate goodness.  I am referring to the observation of Kela and Kizia whose last remembrance of lolo basoy was a lolo Basoy dancing - it must be a wonderful memory to leave behind; it must be wonderful to be remembered dancing. 

Saints are remembered wonderfully too - you see them depicted with eyes looking straight to heaven, with hands clasped in prayer, with lips uttering some quiet prayer.

And here is Basoy remembered beautifully too ... dancing.  You may say your “wow” in amazement, or your “what?” in a state of shock.  But Basoy was always just... Basoy.  May the good Lord bring us happy surprises in this life and even more in the life to come. 

Tay Basoy may your rest surprised, surprised and amazed at God’s marvellous ways in and through your life.  Now God will reveal all of these to you.